So deep she looked into my eyes “Son ,Fight your demons” But how can I mama? How can I fight myself I am my own demon I fear me I don’t wanna be me How can I tell you The first thing I do when I wake up Is mask me It’s not easy to wake up with a smile Wait I forgot how that even felt like..waking up Even in this crowded room I feel alone You think you see me I’m not me anymore Just a mirage …just a mirage mummy I crave for those moments when you whooped me And forced me to cry I now cry my heart out without efforts I wonder who the man standing in front of my mirror is Like where did I loose it all I wanna go back and pick it all up Maybe these broken pieces can be glued up back But again… What if the pieces are extra tiny to fix it all The shatters so miniscule to revive I can’t face me I can’t fight me I can’t fight them mummy I am my own demons Astrophel ✨
tomorrow marks the very first step To change , To no turning back, To not coming back, The very first step to this new page That I’m not quite sure of That I have to write A new story that I can’t quite label There’s no escape The very first step of drawing towards The road I’ve often abandoned Or maybe wished to escape The very rite I never advocated for The very path I’m always afraid of Well Tomorrow marks the very day I get to be What I need to be Inorder to fulfill what I ought to do Tomorrow …please be gentle to my feeble feet
Balance… Some weights are hard to balance Especially those that are within Some Yorks are hard to pull Especially those that can only be felt
Those two versions of us Outdoing each other The uglier one winning often It’s rewards being shackles That hold us captive from ourselves Our own reflection ,scary to even face Being set free is what we oftenly yearn for
How about the hollow within So dark that when you’re asleep Better still when you try to ..sleep That moment when your eyes are closed And you let yourself fall ,drown, And the darkness within pulls you Allowing you to explore a bit of… Guilt, loneliness,pain, A taste of each reminding you That real as it is , it’ll forever be a part of you A mark you will forever bear on your forehead A poison that will forever run through your bloodstream A breath so suffocating that you’ll forever take in And you can’t pull yourself out You can’t save yourself All You want to do is to remain stuck Just stuck
And in that moment it dawns on you That there is peace in that violence The noises within are actually a symphony And so your inner self floats Your feeble feet raise craving for freedom grows even more Being set free and not just to ….Balance
Elijah believed in redemption ,to him a savior, Rebecca thought he’d gone mad,no cure for this fever, Freya out of love ,turned out best than ever, And to Hailey brought Joy ,one always to remember, Marcel out of pain never thought he’d been his best father, Hope his little princess became his version better, Coll out of rage never thought he’d soldier To claim in always and forever. This is to you my unknown lover, If ever the stars align in our favor, My flaws are a million Incase you like millioners, My emotions are flooded Incase you fond of the waters, My heart is made of flesh Incase you like meatarians, My actions unpredictable Incase you fond of suspense, Ever heard of a black life ,dull colors might be your favorites, Cause that’s me …no better than Klaus. I might not be honey but lemonade tastes even better, I might not be fun but lame is even cooler, White keys are easy to learn but black ones play better, To form a symphony of always and forever. Well the stars will guide me home, And if I ever I reach Rome, I’d be glad then that… You never met me today, or yesterday, Or even the day before, I was , I am the ripper Joker is my favorite in poker, I’m still waiting for you Camille, Maybe then salvation will, But until then I’ll live, And I will believe , In always and forever.